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Letting go is a part of life. We say farewell to loved ones that have passed on, unhealthy relationships and occasionally, even dreams. A recent epiphany changed my perception of one of my dreams and eased the process of releasing it.
My husband and I love to hike – primarily in the mountains – and most of our hikes are day hikes. (One of our rare overnight hikes resulted in one of us bringing a scorpion home in our pack!) We have hiked bits and pieces of the Appalachian Trail and have discussed working toward hiking the entire 2,180 miles.
It’s important for a couple to have shared, long-term hopes and dreams. Otherwise, the kids grow up and leave home and you are left living with someone that you really don’t know anymore. For me, hiking the Appalachian Trail together was one of those dreams. We didn’t discuss it, but surely my husband felt the same way, right? Not necessarily.
For several years now, my hubby has been all about the AT. He has read numerous books written by those that have hiked the trail, followed several trail journals and researched the best/lightest gear to use for long term hikes.
Last summer, the hubby took a week off work and headed to Amicalola Falls State Park in Georgia to begin a several day shake-down hike from the southern end of the trail. My reaction was a severe case of hurt feelings. How could he begin our dream hike without me? However, I put on my big-girl panties and didn’t let on that his decision bothered me. We talked about it later and he said that he never realized that I would be interested in joining him – he didn’t think that I would enjoy living on the trail for several days at a time. Really? But what about our dream?
We recently went on vacation to the mountains of Virginia and of course, went hiking. One of our planned hikes was a ten mile loop trail. (A loop trail begins and ends at the same point.) We have done ten mile day hikes before and knew that it was easily doable. However, due to unclear/misread instructions our ten mile hike became a fourteen mile hike. The last four miles were pure torture; I wasn’t looking at the scenery and there wasn’t any conversation; I simply had my head down, focusing on the trail and putting one foot in front of the other. I was trying very hard not to burst into tears from sheer exhaustion and the pain in my left foot. However, during the course of the hike – which, believe it or not, I actually enjoyed – I realized that my hubby was right. I really don’t want to spend several days on the trail putting in up to sixteen miles a day in all types of weather, crawling into a tent or shelter at night only to get up at the crack of dawn and do it all again. Not to mention the whole peeing/crapping in the woods deal. After the first couple of days I would not be a happy camper – pun intended. I’ll stick to the day hikes with an occasional overnighter, thank you very much.
My hubby knows that writing is my dream and he supports me completely. Now it’s my turn to do the same for him. So, rest assured, when he hits the trail for a week again this summer I will be his biggest cheerleader; there will be absolutely no reservations or hurt feelings this time. Hmmm, he might actually enjoy it if I go all out with the cheerleader theme – costume and all! 
What about you? Have you ever let go of a dream?
My husband would love it if I went hiking with him, but it’s not my thing. Snakes? Scorpions? No thank you! He and my oldest son did the 12-day hike of Philmont for Boy Scouts a couple years ago. Only one shower during that time. Let’s just say there was some double clothes-washing when they got home!
Twelve days? Wow. That’s about 9 days more than I could handle. I like my showers and indoor plumbing! I might have just tossed those clothes…
I was tempted, but I couldn’t convince them.
But I did make them store them in the garage until they were ready for washing. Which I then made them do themselves…
Lol, good for you!
Awww, Izzy, that could be made into a chick-lit book! Or at least a short story! I don’t think I recently read a post that had me glued to every word like this. In terms of dreams, I tend to grasp their practical rather than their idolized side, and I know how far I can go. I always remember my friend’s tropical paradise honeymoon with the nasty bugs, the gross food resulting in her getting food poisoning, the romantic trail where she ended up spraining her ankle, and the endless rain. That doesn’t mean that I don’t dream. I just try to be casual about it so that if it never comes to be, I won’t be heartbroken.
Wow – thanks Maria!
I have always tended to be a “careful” dreamer as well. However, I find myself dreaming bigger when it comes to my writing and what I would like to accomplish. It’s both exciting and scary!
I had a very big dream that I finally had to let go of after seven years of effort. In its place, I’ve developed a new dream, which is already coming true. From this I’ve learned to always have a backup plan.
I’m sorry that your big dream didn’t work out, but glad that your new one is falling into place.
I think that it is very important to have a backup and to keep moving forward instead of getting stuck. Good luck!